When some people look at the 2017 Audi R8 they gaze at it longingly for several minutes and then they immediately go buy as many lottery tickets as they can afford. After that they go to church and pray for at least a half an hour, even if it’s not their church and the church doors are locked. Then make a call to their parents. They cry on the phone begging for money as they tell their sad story of deprivation and hardship and how life is going to be even more difficult for them if they have to live it without the Audi R8. When all of the above has failed to deliver the hoped for bundles of money, they go home and begin writing letters to their long lost aunts and uncles and cousins, telling them of the great investment opportunity that they just stumbled upon. All to no avail unfortunately.

You have to ask yourself if and when you find yourself in that situation, “Why would anyone put themselves through such an ordeal just for a car? ”The answer will come without a pause: “BECAUSE IT’S THE AUDI R8 – THAT’S WHY!!!”

Yes, that’s why we have been putting discreet ads in newspapers and on TV giving people subtle reminders about turning away if they suspect that an Audi R8 is driving down their street or heading in their direction. We have seen too many genuinely happy folks become forlorn and pathetic people simply because they glanced at the 2017 Audi R8. We don’t want to see that happen if we can help avoid it.

Yes, we at Audi Valencia sell Audis and we are definitely proud of that fact. And, yes, we sell the Audi R8 also but from now on we are going to keep it under lock and key and we are only going to show it and let people test drive it if they have their physician, therapist or several friends accompany them in case there is a need for an intervention.

We understand what the perfection in design of the R8 along with its incomparable speed and ease of handling can do to a person. We know what it’s like to want to get in to the R8 and hit 60 in 3.5 seconds flat. We are only thinking of your welfare and that’s why we are hiding the R8s on our lot. It’s a great car but it’s just not for every one.